melt down management

a sad Afton...15 months..so cute!

Before I had children, I thought the term meltdown was a bit silly. Really...kids don't just freak out for no reason. There is always a logical explanation for their behavior and a logical way to respond. Ha! Ha! My fully rested, fed and attended to daughter had quite the series of meltdowns mid-morning, while I was struggling with the last church prep needs (solo since my hubby has jetted off to NY...without me again!!). First, she didn't want to wear bows in her braids because they were touching her neck the wrong way (tears followed by tugging ribbons out) . Then the bracelet she chose to wear 30 seconds ago was simply not going to do it (tears followed by dumping out jewelry box for a new bracelet and ring and necklace..all of which end up in my bag 3 minutes into church). Finally, her first step outside erupts into a fit of needing a jacket, even though it's not really jacket weather, so I grab a jacket with my free pinkie and shove it on.

The melt down is inevitably followed by the super pout which means only grunts and growls are heard for several minutes as I try to cheer up my silly sad girl. So today (or tonite since I fell asleep from 8-9 while reading!) I'm sahring some meltdown management techniques. Hopefully I'll remember these over the next few days as I do the single parent dance.

1. Give plenty of warnings. "We're leaving in 5 minutes!" I'm really bad at this one and usually things work out in my favor. This article was a helpful reminder.

2. Feed and water!! Last week, Afton freaked in the grocery store because I wouldn't unload the cart and change it for a different kid cart. I was annoyed and perplexed at her unusually dramatic bahavior. I realized after the fact that I hadn't given her an afternoon snakc and this is how shoe chose to remind me. Feed and water baby!

3. Distraction is my usual charm. I turn the pout party into a tickel fest or remind of a fun activity planned for later in that day.

4. I have found that when leaving one fun place, it's good to have a middle of the road activity/treat/plan in place before reaching home (i.e. after a visit to the children's museum I have a special snack packed to eat on the ride home or plan the day so that movie time happens after this).

5. Bribe. Reward. Coerce. There are many words for it. It's one of my favorite parenting strategies! Afton has a sticker chart that she lives for. She chooses a free or inexpensive activity or treat to earn by listening and following direction, being a happy helper and any other time I notice her being overall great. The dreaded sticker removal is something to fear and usually nips any fiesty behavior.

6. Hugs & Kisses. Sometimes I just need to wrap my arms around my little girl and give her a squeeze. I love when this remedy heals the sadness

After doing some reasearch of meltdowns, I'm so grateful that my children are so mild. Now how to handle Abel's powerful neck muscles that aid in his head throwing/body arching maneuver...I know you have a great tip to share so make sure to!